As I was working on my latest book, I reflected on this sweet memory from several years ago, when I was putting the final touches to FASCINATE: How to Make Your Brand Impossible to Resist. I just had to share it with you...
This weekend I was writing the introduction for my book. I sat drinking coffee, typing on the sofa, and watching my son playing.
My son Asher is 10 years old, and he expresses himself with the fearlessness of a young boy who has not yet acquired the self-doubt of public failure. He hasn’t learned how to be boring, yet.
I know he'll probably learn soon. Or more accurately, the world will teach him.
One day he will forget the steps, or miss the ball, or flunk the test. Someone will tell him he’s not good enough or smart enough or cool enough. Too this or not enough that.
And no matter how untrue it is, no matter how much evidence there is to the contrary, he'll take his spark and hide it away in a box, high on a shelf.
Here’s what I want to tell my children, and your children, and you:
You don’t need to find the light. You are the light.
When you let your personality shine, you can light up the world.
How do you encourage your kids to shine?
Sally, This is a great lesson for grown ups. We need to be more childlike. Fearless, persistent, genuine, and ever curious. Cheers, Marc
Thank you so much for this post. Today I am about to give a talk at a workshop for teachers at an International School in Mozambique. I am a preschool / kinder / Grade 1 teacher but love books and the English language and watching how the children I teach learn things. I have been asked to do this talk as I seem to have the ability to reach all the children across the ages and language barriers - a word I have always loved and tried to incorporate in my dealings with children is "fascinate". So I typed it in the search engine today and found your blog post. So inspiring, so exciting and so fascinating. Thank you.
What a powerful and nourishing statement, Sally! i LOVE your assessment and cannot wait to use the children's version for all my genius clients as well! Otto http://www.geniuscoaching.com
Whenever my kids argue that other kids have something or get to do something that they are not allowed, I ask them, "What does that have to do with you?" This teaches them to separate themselves from being judged by the crowd, and now they are independent young people.
Amen Amen! My 9 year old girl lights up the whole world too. We must be keepers of the flame...
Hey Sally, My kids are grown up now with little ones of their own. I always taught them to look and love what's on the inside of a person, not the outside. You search for the true person and if you fall for someone, don't try to change them. You wouldn't have fallen if you didn't love that inside person. I have tried my best to live this way, been tough a few times, but I try also to find the good in everybody. I try to lead by example and I can only hope that they pass this message on to my grandchildren....I know I will do my part! You should understand this Sally, as we are the same archetype! I am so thankful I took your test before Vegas! I've learned a lot from listening to you and reading everything you send and I understand more now about why I do certain things they way I do them. You have a very precious daughter and I know she will be just fine with a Mom like you!
Fortunately, our kids have grown into very mature adults in their 20s. We just handed off my little girl this past May to the guy that is now taking my place in marriage. Growing up, we always stood on the side of our kids. We taught them to stand up against the bullies and naysayers of the world. I taught them, especially my daughter, to challenge anyone who told her she was too this or that. She watched me closer than I thought growing up because many people say she is just like me. Challenging the norm, standing up for the helpless, looking for better ways to do just about everything, and just plain being honest in all she does. Tim's quick course on raising a warrior - Stand on their side of the line, and in front of them if they are being attacked. Show them how, not just tell them how, be honest and apologize often because you are not always right, and offer solutions not just complaints. Yep, she is just like me but backwards. I am the Rockstar and she is the Catalyst. Together, we are Dangerous - in a good way.
Beautiful. Thanks for sharing such personal, brilliant and tender thoughts. It's a great reminder for me, my wife of twelve years, and our five year old son.
Wow. I totally stole that and posted it on my 2 daughters' facebook pages. Wow.
"when you let your personality shine, you can light up the world" GORGEOUS WORDS. I will be sure to keep this in mind as I currently am sailing through the beautiful waters of being a New mum.